seifukucat:

welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous. i’m seeing a lot of new faces in the crowd this week and i just have to say i’m really disappointed

(via anidioticblogger)

kateswann:

my partner tried to call me a sweetheart the other day but he misspelled it and I read it as “sweetbeard” and then I decided that this is what dwarf couples call each other

so, naturally, here are two dwarves on a date

(via i-am-sundance-kid)

a practical guide to becoming a true pun master

animeteen:

  1. accept that no pun is actually Good, but that the true nature of a good pun is to be so terrible that it becomes good.
  2. say every pun that occurs to you. i’m so serious about this, sometimes the most well received puns will be ones you considered not saying.
  3. ALWAYS laugh at your own puns, even if nobody else is. (especially if nobody else is.)
  4. know that you are hilarious. puns are a limitless resource and you have taken it as your duty to bring this gift to humanity. you are a hero.

(Source: kiluas, via biglywolf)